Growing up, one of my favorite things to do was going to the movies. It didn’t matter if it was with just my parents when I was a kid or with my friends/girlfriend as I got older. It was a destination. I enjoyed the smells; I enjoyed the ambiance; I even enjoyed getting my feet stuck to the theater floor for two hours. And during those hours, you were transported to a grand utopia of arcades, junk food, loud noises and pee breaks.
But as the years have passed, we don’t go to the cinema the way we used to, do we? I’ll still attend the big blockbuster event movies and maybe a few others — but in general, we aren’t interested in attending movies the way we were 15 or 20 years ago. I saw some atrocious movies in theaters during the 90’s: Caspar, The Phantom, At First Sight, Congo, and Blues Brothers 2000, just to name a few. But now it takes a 90% Rotten Tomatoes rating, a close friend’s invite, and a sewage leak in my kitchen for me to even consider heading out.
Something must have changed. Obviously theaters themselves are a little different now, but if anything they’re nicer. They’re cleaner with bigger seats and bigger screens. Hell, some even offer a full menu service inside, and most have a full bar. A full bar! I should be dying to get into these palaces of happiness!
But here’s where the problems begin. With these lavish changes and upgrades, along came prices increasing slightly quicker than just normal inflation. Those bar drinks ain’t cheap — I’ve gotten less expensive bourbon in West Hollywood. Popcorn and soda were always overpriced, but I shouldnt have to put a lean on my home if I want the large instead of the medium. And the less said about ticket cost, the better — this ain’t Cirque du Soleil, AMC.
But some of these bloated prices also simply reflect a lack of sales in general. Avid movie-goers are now paying an arm and three legs to account for the already plummeting seat attendance. So clearly, there’s been more leading up to this.
Without question, the home viewing experience has made leaps and bounds since I was in high school. Now I don’t want to hate on our old, blurry 24″ tube TV — with its speakers that sound like AM radio and a Buick-sized VCR. That entertainment center was a sweet setup. But the 4K Ultra HD flat TVs of today that cover your entire wall and offer Dolby Digital surround sound? Um. Suddenly that theater doesn’t look quite as impressive as it did in the late 90’s. Wait, I did say “theater” and not “hairline,” right? Okay, good.
And it isn’t just the video and audio quality. As comfortable as theater seats have gotten, they’ll never beat out your own couch. Sitting there in your underwear. With your fridge full of free snacks and booze. Your own bathroom 20 feet away, and a pause feature for when you need to go. Oh, and I’ll text or take a call during the show if I damn well want! Because we can just rewind! Just kidding…nobody “takes calls” anymore. Ridiculous.
Which essentially brings up the point of streaming. We can stream just about anything these days for free. Five bucks max maybe. No matter how new the film, there’s usually some way to find it and stream it at home. So forget about that $50 minimum you were about to spend on a movie date. Now it’s Netflix and chill. And I suppose the “chill” part is another added bonus to staying in.
But the all-encompassing element here is simply the way society itself has changed. We don’t leave the house very often unless we absolutely have to. Stores? Nah, we do all our shopping online, and it shows up at our door in two days. Restaurants? Nah, we’ve got Uber Eats and GrubHub to deliver us pretty much any food we want right here on the couch. What is the incentive to leave this couch? A movie? Seriously? I’ve got the entire world right here in front of me. And that’s where we’d rather stay.
Sure, we still go out for socializing, bike rides, happy hour, and major events. But this is the point: going to the movies used to be a major event. It was epic and magical and…okay, maybe I’m overselling it just a bit. It wasn’t Disney World. But it was something special. And if Cinemark and AMC ever want to reestablish that allure, these are the hurdles they have to overcome.
I’m not saying I agree with it all. I miss those old days at the theater. It was a ton of fun. In fact, maybe I’ll go check out a flick tonight. It’d be nice to–…oh look, the new season of Shameless is on demand! Shhh.